Pineapple Pete

Well, Percy and Lil got married on Saturday and a lovely day was had by all. I didn't get much of a chance to chat to them as they had to dash away on their honeymoon, well, I say honeymoon but they're just having three days in Bolsover, then they have to come back because Percy is due to have two teeth out and Lil needs her ears syringing.

But we all stayed on and danced the night away till the drink ran out at about half past eight. What a treat to see Slack up and enjoying herself after all these years without her Willy. It reminded me of years back when Slack had a crush on the local bandleader, Pineapple Pete and his pearldivers. I always remember him because he had the biggest feet I'd ever seen. Slack said that was probably because he came from somewhere were they didn't have shoes and his feet had spread, but she was in a lovers trance and I have a suspicion the last thing she was thinking about was the size of his feet.

You see, it all started one night when he picked her out twice in a spot waltz, and she's never been picked out before. And afterwards she said that he'd been looking at her all night with a glint in his eye, and Slack never forgot him. In fact this morning she called me and said 'Laz, I wonder if Pineapple Pete ever went back to his island in the sun? I shall never forget how he looked at me.'

Well, I jut couldn't answer her. How could I tell her, after all these years, that his real name was Fred Crutchin, he was a steamboiler welder and had a glass eye?