1000th Visitor

I'm sorry there isn't a picture today. Blogger wouldn't upload and I've not the patience to wait in this heat. I haven't waited since an incident in 1938 when I was on tour with Ivory Pete. He used to play old shanty songs on his teeth with his fingernails. He was very good as well, If you closed your eyes you could smell the sea. Heigh ho.

Anyway, I don't know what to do in this weather, I don't know if it's monday, tuesday, next wednesday or half day closing I really don't. Mind you Slack gets it hard in this weather, She does, her legs swell up and resemble a couple of bolsters.

It's her little dog I feel sorry for though, cooped up in that house with all the windows closed for fear of the gas man catching her in. I remember when she bought that dog, little long haired mexican it was. I said to her 'Slack, thats not right, all that long hair, they should have short hair them dogs, get yourself down to Boots the cash chemist and ask for something to get rid of the hairs.' Well Slack did as I said and went down to Boots, she asked the man if he had anything for little short hairs, as it happened he didn't but he kindly offered to mix her something up and told her to come back in half an hour.

Half an hour later Slack popped back and the chemist said 'Right, what you want to do is spread this thinly all over your legs. . . . ' she stopped him right there.

'Oh,' she said ' It's not for my legs, it's for my little chihuaha'

'Well in that case,' he said 'Don't ride your bike for a fortnight!'

Any road, that's not what I was going to say, I noticed I've almost reached a 1000 visitors, not many I know but I'm what you call a niche market. If you can prove to me your the 1000'th visitor, god knows how, a special prize will be winging its way to you. I'm not sure of the prize as yet but I'll have a rummage around and see whats lying in the prop box.

I've a very nice picture of me looking just like Lou Ayers in 'All Quiet on The Western Front'.